tw for sexist language, thanks a bunch classmate dude

[esmenet]

I feel like I should stop attempting to be friendly with the guys in my language classes. First semester of Japanese: talked mostly to awesome older girl, had few awkward moments, everything mostly okay. Second semester of Japanese: talked mostly to this one dude, he apparently thought I was flirting with him and asked me out. Third and fourth semesters: one dude tended to talk my ear off about video games and Wheel of Time but was pretty much okay, other one was Benevolent Sexist. First semester of Chinese: dude I talk to the most comments "That's what happens when you're a whore, nobody likes you" about a single mother in a film we were watching in class.

. . . .Yyyyeah, gonna stick with girls for a while. Sometimes I feel like I should just not talk to guys face-to-face at all. I love the internet; you can tell if someone's a jerk BEFORE you say anything to them.

Next class, going to sit on the other side of the girl I sit next to, because if I don't I'll be twitching at sitting next to that dude again.


(On the other hand, almost all the dudes in this year's Japanese 101 seem perfectly nice. I should visit that class more often.)

Comments

[aldanise]

*sigh* I had something of that experience with my language classes, except that the problem wasn't quite as gendered (still gendered! But a few female jerks, too. And a few nice men). It's like talking in another language makes people feel like they have a right to say nasty things they couldn't get away with in a non-language class, and a lot of the nasty things are about women.

One classmate (man) in a Japanese class once joked to me that the taxonomy of male students of Japanese went something like: the geeks, the ones who want to make a lot of money, and the ones who want a Japanese girlfriend. It was disturbingly accurate for our class, and the proportion of geeks not nearly high enough.