(no subject)
Jun. 2nd, 2011 03:50 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
esmenetI am hiding from so many things right now, everyone. SO MANY THINGS. The joining/not-joining thing for the half-an-hour-away youth orchestra, the volunteer application to the twenty-minutes-away library, emailing my librarian friend at the local library for a volunteer application there, calling the director of the local orchestra to apply, my almost-finished scarf, exercise, cooking, Chinese tones, all the unclicked 'reply' buttons in my f/r-list, all the read but un-replyed-to emails in my inbox, signing up for Arabic class in the fall, signing up for fma_ladyfest. And all my ongoing writing, of course.
The one thing I am not hiding from is kink_bingo, because I am absolutely unable to participate in it. It's kind of sad, really—I see everyone so excited about it every time, but all my kinks are narrative kinks* and so there's never, ever anything I'd want to write. Plenty of stuff I'd enjoy reading, because there are plenty of amazing authors signed up (and asexual kink lists, yay!) but I guess I just don't write about that kind of thing. Oh well?
And so now I'm going to get ready for the book sale this evening, and then after that I will maybe start writing the fics I've been plotting in my head, and I will sign up for![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
fma_ladyfest and I will watch Japanese things with the subs turned off and do leg exercises. Yes.
I wish there were a thing that I could just set to block all cis-abled-dudes-centric fics unless I specifically turned it off or added exceptions. Because the majority of fic that I don't really enjoy all that much but waste all my time on is cis-abled-dudes (it's never just the one dude) fic in large fandoms, and I would really really like to be able to stop doing that in favor of doing something useful. I mean, refreshing my email every half hour is just as non-useful, but it takes a lot less long.
*Along the lines of "people hang out and solve problems and maybe hug sometimes!"
The one thing I am not hiding from is kink_bingo, because I am absolutely unable to participate in it. It's kind of sad, really—I see everyone so excited about it every time, but all my kinks are narrative kinks* and so there's never, ever anything I'd want to write. Plenty of stuff I'd enjoy reading, because there are plenty of amazing authors signed up (and asexual kink lists, yay!) but I guess I just don't write about that kind of thing. Oh well?
And so now I'm going to get ready for the book sale this evening, and then after that I will maybe start writing the fics I've been plotting in my head, and I will sign up for
fma_ladyfest and I will watch Japanese things with the subs turned off and do leg exercises. Yes.I wish there were a thing that I could just set to block all cis-abled-dudes-centric fics unless I specifically turned it off or added exceptions. Because the majority of fic that I don't really enjoy all that much but waste all my time on is cis-abled-dudes (it's never just the one dude) fic in large fandoms, and I would really really like to be able to stop doing that in favor of doing something useful. I mean, refreshing my email every half hour is just as non-useful, but it takes a lot less long.
*Along the lines of "people hang out and solve problems and maybe hug sometimes!"
no subject
Date: 2011-06-02 09:50 pm (UTC)Hope you're able to not-hide as you wish soon.
no subject
Date: 2011-06-03 12:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-06-05 01:50 am (UTC)You are absolutely awesome enough! I love love love the bits you've posted, because yes to the way she cuts herself off in the middle of a thought, and ouch to those two paragraphs about lining up her thought-armies and everybody's fascination with her mental state. Azula is super tricky but I think you're doing much better with her than I ever do, and I'm looking forward to your fic so much.
no subject
Date: 2011-06-05 02:42 am (UTC)Oh, goodness, that's TOTALLY fine.
Azula is super tricky
Quoted for truth. And I keep wanting to write her at a time when her whole understanding of power (not to mention, way of relating to people) has imploded. Which means I feel like I've already broken everything before I started. Nor does it help that whenever I do write Azula, I feel sort of like an artist who has the perfect painting/sculpture/craft/etc., in her head but what she made didn't come out like that at all.
The good news is, I've pretty much gotten over the fear and now it's 1200ish words. Is it finished? Is it even a draft? No, but it'll get there..I hope.