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the below are entirely personal thoughts with no application to anyone but me
I can understand not being asexual. I can even sort of get my head around enjoying real-life romance. But apparently my limit of personal comprehension* is not being a lesbian. I have no idea what that's like! I can't imagine it! How do people not get ridiculously excited about ladies doing ALL THE THINGS? With each other? I want all my favorite female characters to run away and get married to each other and be happy, and I want to surround myself with excellent ladies both real and fictional and stay that way forever. I can't imagine wanting anything else.
This post is brought on by a) the exceedingly late hour and b) the following events: earlier this evening I was listening to Monstrous Regiment for the nth time, and re-re-realizing just how much I ship Polly/Maladict, and how much I ship that kind of pairing in general, and how much harder I ship any kind of pairing when both chatacters involved are female (and/or genderqueer). Then I read a bit of a fic about an m/m ship that hits all my dudeslash kinks, and in the middle of doing that I had a stray thought about ladyslash which sent me into a literal flailing fit of LADY FEELINGS and how much there need to be more ladies in everything, especially ridiculous epic love stories with big sprawling plots (which I suppose Monstrous Regiment sort of is, if you tilt your head and squint, but the fic I was reading was not). I know people probably get flailing DUDE FEELINGS moments, but I've never had them and just can't imagine having that intensity of feeling about something that doesn't contain any ladies. I get good happy feelings from my favorite dude characters and celebrities (Tyler Posey I am looking at you), but it's just not the same at all. The scale is totally different.
Also, sometimes I am reading/watching something about dudes doing dude things and having manpain and stuff I don't care about, and I literally say out loud "whatever, you're not even a lady." (Even if I'm not particularly invested in something, I feel more invested if there are female characters involved. If it's just male characters? Eh.)
Of course all of this is all bound up in my reactions to sexism & such, but I think it's fair to say a large part of my character and preferences in general are a direct or indirect reaction to sexism and related things, e.g. oh, girly-girls can't be serious? a) fuck you, I'll be as girly as I want, and b) fuck you, I don't have to be serious, there's not a law.
*Well, I also don't really understand being a dude, or not caring about clothes, but those are just some of those things other people are interested in that I am not. But I just genuinely do not grok not being All About The Ladies.
This post is brought on by a) the exceedingly late hour and b) the following events: earlier this evening I was listening to Monstrous Regiment for the nth time, and re-re-realizing just how much I ship Polly/Maladict, and how much I ship that kind of pairing in general, and how much harder I ship any kind of pairing when both chatacters involved are female (and/or genderqueer). Then I read a bit of a fic about an m/m ship that hits all my dudeslash kinks, and in the middle of doing that I had a stray thought about ladyslash which sent me into a literal flailing fit of LADY FEELINGS and how much there need to be more ladies in everything, especially ridiculous epic love stories with big sprawling plots (which I suppose Monstrous Regiment sort of is, if you tilt your head and squint, but the fic I was reading was not). I know people probably get flailing DUDE FEELINGS moments, but I've never had them and just can't imagine having that intensity of feeling about something that doesn't contain any ladies. I get good happy feelings from my favorite dude characters and celebrities (Tyler Posey I am looking at you), but it's just not the same at all. The scale is totally different.
Also, sometimes I am reading/watching something about dudes doing dude things and having manpain and stuff I don't care about, and I literally say out loud "whatever, you're not even a lady." (Even if I'm not particularly invested in something, I feel more invested if there are female characters involved. If it's just male characters? Eh.)
Of course all of this is all bound up in my reactions to sexism & such, but I think it's fair to say a large part of my character and preferences in general are a direct or indirect reaction to sexism and related things, e.g. oh, girly-girls can't be serious? a) fuck you, I'll be as girly as I want, and b) fuck you, I don't have to be serious, there's not a law.
*Well, I also don't really understand being a dude, or not caring about clothes, but those are just some of those things other people are interested in that I am not. But I just genuinely do not grok not being All About The Ladies.
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I hear ya, I hear ya!
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Anyway, whatever you call it I do also find the lack of it hard to understand. Women are pretty great :) (Though I do enjoy the odd woman-focused het story, if it starts being About The Guy I am very sad and confused)
(*)For lack of a better word
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